Destroyed

Published November 5, 2013 by rebelpet

I was too blind to see

That things had changed

No longer looking at me

I had become invisible

I gave him heart and trust

And believed in his promise

Honesty was a must

Love I thought I found

Something special we had

Or that is what I thought

This pain hurts so bad

That chapter turns to gray

I was not good enough

My heart to be razed

This is going to be tough

Keeping my pain locked away

I was just his toy

A dirty little secret

Was that his ploy

This entire time?

Shock made me freeze

Rebel and Panther paused

Lungs and heart in a squeeze

My words not spoken with truth

~”But I though you loved me

Please don’t leave

Don’t let this be

What happens to us.

When you fell for her

Why wasn’t I told?”~

I have lost my Sir

He has abandoned me.

How can I ever trust him

Since he has spouted lies?

My skies no longer blue

They turned to black of night

Confusion, anger, grief and hurt

Roiling inside rebuilt walls

I was just a skirt

Another notch on his belt.

My worst nightmare come true

He doesn’t love me

Our past an ugly hue

Did he ever love me?

Left here hanging

My world upside down

Everything I’m questioning/All the while knowing

He isn’t here to ask.

Why did he wait

Until the last minute

To tell me his plans

Giving me no time to think

Why did he hide

Behind shortened time?

Now I’m here to bide

My actions, thoughts and time

I can’t let him know

How I’m feeling inside

Or this will blow

And I lose him forever

My facade is in place

Trying to be stoic

Me, he will replace

With one who is sub par.

If this was his game

Vulnerability he can’t see

Or I’m to blame

For his knowing

I should have known

Not to give my heart

Allowing it to be blown

To bloody bits and pieces.

Up my walls go again

There they have got to stay

Never knowing when

Another game may come.

Heartbroken, in disrepair

I am destroyed inside

Had to cut my hair

To try to ease the pain

When he comes home

I will have on my mask

True feelings to not roam

Things won’t be the same.

My friend might be missing

When I need him the most

His voice so soothing

To the raging animal.

I’m his friend first

Hoping he doesn’t disappear

Losing him would be the worst

But I think I already have.

~”Please just give me time

To get over losing you.

Until then my actions I mime

So you don’t see the heart of me.”~

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